I had this thought that many individuals get enticed into “affairs” not only for the excitement and rush, but also the “joy” that they feel.  I first want to explain affairs as a term meaning any kind of inappropriate relationship or activity outside marriage, or the knowledge of your partner.  This could be a physical relationship, sexually acting out, or an emotional affair such as chat and email correspondence.

In many cases there is the joy of being known or at least the perception of being known by someone.  There is the “connection” with another person and the feeling that you are able to “be yourself”.  There is the excitement of sexual activities that can be perceived as bringing happiness to a boring life.  If you are caught up in these scenarios or have been stop and think for a minute how much happiness and joy they actually brought to you.

Was there really any true joy?  Doesn’t one have to reject their spouse and turn them into a villain in order to justify these actions?  There is a great deal of torment, secrecy, deception, denial, and betrayal, which can not be associated with joy.  This seems like the true trap of affairs!  One seeks joy by foregoing their true relationship, and in that betrayal they are conned into believing they will find joy.  In actuality they have made for themselves a life completely devoid of any true joy, choosing instead to live on adrenaline and constant suspicion as they seek to cover up their secrets with lies and anger.

Yes, I am not fully recognizing all the various components involved in the affair, and the process leading up to that point, but I feel an overwhelming stronghold is the belief that one will experience joy in their newly found sin.  I come back to the questions then, how much joy have you found in your affair?

I suspect none.